Warning: this post contains Family Stuff, and has nothing at all to do with Maine, the island, or knitting. Skip right by if you were looking for any of that. However, if you're of a mind to listen to some comedy the likes of Martin and Lewis...keep reading.
My youngest sister ,M2 ,and my cousin The Big Ragu, are cohabiting. They both are rather freshly divorced, and it makes sense for them to share a house. M2 has two kids, which Ragu loves (ohhh, I miss them so much, I don't get to see them enough..). And now, two cats, which Ragu puts up with.(Not really a cat person...and of course the cats adore him and are up his butt all the time). Somehow, despite all odds, this works. (Okay, most of the time.)
But let me tell you, the best part of the whole thing is not the fact that the rest of the family has peace of mind knowing that M2 is not 'alone' at night with the kids, that Ragu is not eating in front of the tv- directly out of a can, somebody knows where he is most of the time, etc. No, the best part is the stories.
These two make the odd couple look like Romeo and Juliet. They could not be less alike, and it makes for some great stories.
Like the time M2 was so tired and couldn't wait to go to bed early. She gets the kids settled in early, heads for her bedroom (located, unfortunately, very near the laundry room), only to notice that Ragu has washed his sneakers, and has just placed them in the dryer.
whump, whump, whump, for hours. He's obsessive about his laundry. So is she.
Mind you, he goes out of his way to be conscientious, but somehow it always backfires!
There was the morning, just after having the lawn re-seeded by a landscaping company, she turned on the water sprinklers. She asked him to turn them off before he left for work, and she left the house. When she came home, the whole street was flooded, and there was, of course, no seed left on their lawn. He forgot to shut them off. The sprinklers ran for, like, 10 hours.
But he has a lot to put up with from her,. She is one of those 'extreme eaters'. She goes for weeks eating nothing but healthy low fat, high fiber foods....(quote from Ragu, who grew up eating my Aunt's fabulous home cooking (world-famous chicken meatballs and chicken wings) " I would kill myself if I had to eat that crap every day for the rest of my life". And he gets upset with the umm, side-effects, of a high fiber diet that she is famous for.) She then goes on junk food binges for a few days. Meaning that there is only food around that he won't eat most of the time; and junk food,which is not really food: ice cream, cereal, pretzels and chips ...you know, the college diet, the rest of the time. He is a leftover junkie. If you walk near him with a styrofoam take out container, he'll jump you. Especially Chinese food. He's one of those guys you love to cook for, cause he'll eat anything, anytime. Pizza for breakfast? He's on it. Eggs for supper? Why the hell not? Chinese food at 3am? Absolutely!
So this most recent blunder is the reason I'm 'outing' them and their intertwined lives.
It's classic Ragu.
He plugged the toilet in the upstairs bathroom. (I myself never have this problem, and am bewildered as to what that's all about.) He fixed it, but NO! The toilet was NOT unclogged, and in fact, unbeknownst to him, began spewing water out of the tank, onto the floor, and out of the room! Down three stories, into the basement! This apparently went on for HOURS. There was hell to pay when M2 got home.
My other sister, M1, and I are taking bets as to what she made him do to clean up...(and we know damn well she made him clean up).I suspect there is a toothbrush involved; M1 is wondering if he's sleeping in his car.
Stay tuned for more escapades in the continuing life and times of Felix and Oscar.
p.s. Got sidetracked on the darn sock. I'm on the toe, but haven't touched it all day.
*sigh* maybe tomorrow.
p.p.s. Christopher Walken (who Denis Leary calls 'The Alien") is hosting Saturday Night Live tomorrow night. It's must-see. Tape it if you can't stay up (wus).
I heard a rumor that there will be an update of the cowbell skit!!!
p.p.p.s. Played our usual marathon card game again tonight, in teams this time.
In a rare upset, my teammate and I pulled a win out of our butts!
Thanks, J, for letting me kick your a$$ again! 1410!
I find it very funny that you have NEVER, EVER clogged a toilet and caused running water in your life. Repressed memory, perhaps???
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